Egg Donation

So I've been looking into Egg Donation the last week.  And I think it's something I want to do but I'm not 100% sure yet.  And I've been trying to talk to my mom about it but she says stuff like "why would I want to know that"  I'm trying to make an informed decision about this and I don't feel like I have anyone I can talk to about it.  My aunt is going to look over the fertility clinics website that does them here by me and she said she would be more then willing to talk to me about it and support whatever I choose.

The Clinic is located 45 Minutes south of me, I have a 12 page application I have to fill out with family history etc on it, then have to do a phone interview with a nurse, go over for an exam, std testing etc.  Plus it's nice that they compensate you while you get to help out others.

I'm really thinking about this, if anyone can offer some insight I'd really appreciate it or if anyones ever dontated I'd love to be able to talk with you about it and how you feel about it and what was all involved.

Thanks!

    You know I'm really po'd right now.  I am more than a piece of ass and yet I get treated like that's all I am.

This guy I've known for 2-3 years now, that's basically all I am to him, which thankfully it only took me once to realize that.  Tonight he IM's me asking me about some chick.  Tellin me he's known her since June, and they went out Monday for a beer.  So I call that a date right. (remember this its later in the story)   So he's askin me all about this chick and he asked if I knew her and I said I didn't but I'd ask around. And he asked if I knew someone and I said maybe and he askes me why I'm getting all mysterious on him.  So I come right out and say "i don't understand how I'm only good enough to fuck"  so he gets all OMG I can't do this tonight and I said fine but we are going to talk about it sometime.  And I told him not on the internet so he's like ok the phone.  No, no phone and he starts, I'm really busy idk when we can get together to talk, so he goes "it could be a really long time"  so I pull out the "well if you had time to go on a date, you can find time to talk to me for 30min"  and then he gets all "it wasn't a date she was in town and wanted to go for a beer"  What the hell ever I call that a date!  So he gets all attitudey and is like I'm not talkin about this now I have a headache.  Whatever.

Do you think I'm wrong for calling him out on this?  He calls me all the time and wants me to come over for sex, or im's me tellin me he wants me to come over, yet he comes out and asks me about other girls he's interested in.  What the hell.  Then tells me he asks me because he knows he can trust me because I'm a friend.  Hate to break it to you but I DON'T Sleep with my friends.

So anyways I'm done.  I'm not settling, I'm not accepting anyting until I find the guy who is RIGHT for me. 

I gotta carve pumpkins tomorrow then work 3-11.  It's the last week at the pumpkin patch so I have like an insane amount of hours 23 to be exact.  I dunno If I'll be there all 23 hours because if we are slow they send us home but you never know!!  I'm carving a stripper on my pumpkin.  No suprise there right..LOL

Isn't this interesting.   What a guy's Ideal is, compared to what a woman's Ideal is compared to National Average

  A little inspiration for the day.

Weighed in.  Down 24.8lbs!

Don't Quit

When you've eaten too much and you can't write it down,
And you feel like the biggest failure in town.
When you want to give up just because you gave in,
and forget all about being healthy and thin.
So What! You went over your points a bit,
It's your next move that counts...So don't you quit!
It's a moment of truth, it's an attitude change.
It's learning the skills to get back in your range.
It's telling yourself, "You've done great up till now.
You can take on this challenge and beat it somehow."
It's part of your journey toward reaching your goal.
You're still gonna make it, just stay in control.
To stumble and fall is not a disgrace,
If you summon the will to get back in the race.
But, often the struggler's, when loosing their grip,
Just throw in the towel and continue to slip.
And learn too late when the damage is done,
that the race wasn't over...they still could have won.
Lifestyle change can be awkward and slow,
but facing each challenge will help you grow.
Success is failure turned inside out,
the silver tint in a cloud of doubt.
When you're pushing to the brink, just refuse to submit,
If you bite it, you write it....But don't you quit!
- Author Unknown

Where the hell is my break?!

Seriously what do I have to do to get a break? 

According to Michigan Works and the State of Michigan I need to fuck up my life by getting knocked up, not have the dad around, live off food stamps, get state assistance and THEN and ONLY THEN will they help me.  What kind of fucked up bullshit is that?!?!  So beacuse I chose to be a responsible 23 year old and do what I can to hold down a full time job, and go to school to better myself now that I get laid off I can't have any sort of help in return??  Isn't this what I pay all my damn taxes for???  So it's there when I need it?  Apparently not, I only pay it so those who are bottom feeders who relish on the fact that they get free money can have it.  I still have to bust my ass to make my ends meet and figure out how to get myself out of debt and get another job, but not them, ooh no, lets just give them free money until our pockets rot out.  Bullshit.  I don't see how anyone can be proud or share the fact that they take advantage of welfare.  I'm sorry but to me it's the lowest means of survivial, I'd rather work fast food the rest of my life then suck off welfare.  I hate welfare anyways, I think it should be gotten rid of period.  Everyone is given the same chances.  Some people are better off and have a little bit better chance but there are still ways for people who aren't as fortunate as others to get help, everyone can go to college, it's just some people don't care to apply themsleves to anything other than beer drinking and reproducing more bottom feeders.

So thursday I go to work like normal, bust my ass to get my work done, get ready to go to lunch and get called into my managers office.  He then tells me and the girl I work with that during the managers meeting they decided to permanantly lay us both off.  Great.  So now I'm stuck without a job again, sitting at home with no money to do anything.  I mean yea I can draw unemployment but who knows when the first check will come.  I'm hoping soon so I can pay a couple bills.  I owe verizon some money for my cell and have a best buy payment due on the 31st.  I have the money to pay them, I just want to be able to save as much as possible while I don't have a job.

On 9/19 I went and got one of the piercings I posted about earlier.  One I wanted bad but I went a different route.  Instead of getting a surface cleavage piercing I got 2 microdermal piercings in the spot the cleavage piercing would go.  Reason being, the microdermals won't reject because they are anchored in the skin.  So far I love them.  I've gotten a lot of mixed reviews on them, to "those are sexy" to "what made you want to do that, thats stupid"  It's my body, my choice.  Once I get back into the swing of my weight loss thing and I drop some more weight I'm going to get some more tattoos, that is if I have a job, which I'm hoping to have one soon.

Last night while talking to my friend Matt, he told me his place of employment Circuit City was hiring and it was for permanant people.  So while talking I applied.  I got a phone call this morning at around 11am for an interview for Thursday.  Very cool, but it's a group interview and I hate those!  I'm going to have to talk to them about only scheduling me so much because I still want/need to be able to draw my unemployment to make ends meet.  Well see how Thursday goes.

Friday I have to go to Flint for my CMA exam.  I'm really nervous about it, I don't feel prepared and I'm not sure what to expect.  I still haven't gotten my admission ticket yet either and the test is in 3 days!  I'm hoping it comes in the mail Tuesday.  I'm supposed to ride down with 2 girls on Thursday and we are going to stay over night but I don't get outta class til 10 so I gotta find out if they are willing to wait for me to get out of class or what.  I really don't want to drive to Flint by myself and the place we have to go for the testing isn't exactly in the best part of town

Alright It's bed time.  If I think of anything more I'll add to this or post new.

 Not much to say nore do I have the time to say it.  Just wanted to update my ticker!  23lbs!  I'm excited, things are moving alone nicely!